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Date Created
8-2024
Contributor's Age
44
Contributor's Gender
Male
Contributor's Ethnicity
Mexican
Contributor's Occupation
Associate Director of Vocational Training
Contributor's Education
Senior (Social Work Major / Public Administration Minor)
Summary of Testimonio
A. connects linguistic shame with his process of self-acceptance as a bilingual Latino/Chicano. A. notes his Spanish “is not that bad,” since he can speak and communicate, but lacks Spanish speakers to communicate with in his personal life. To A. the most poignant experience of linguistic shame is around the stigma surrounding Spanish sounding names, specially when he joined the U.S. Air Force in 2002. The Americanization and mockery of his name caused lasting shame and feelings of inferiority tied to his bilingual skills and Latinx identity. To cope, A. built separate linguistic and community "boxes," which he now sees as part of the self-harm. Over time, he has worked to break free from this boxing and embrace his bilingualism as a natural and empowering way to express himself. While native bilingualism can be a source of benefit, A. has mostly experience as a source of harm and shame, leading to feelings of anger, unhealthy relations and negative self-thoughts, and other challenges and barriers in his life. A. distinguishes between internal and external linguistic harm, acknowledging that while external harm is beyond his control, his personal journey focuses on eliminating self-inflicted harm. Through this transformation, he reinvented a healthier self-image as a U.S. citizen with Mexican heritage, and has a desire to share his experience to build community.
Resumen del Testimonio
A. relaciona la violencia lingüística con su proceso de autoaceptación como latino/chicano bilingüe. A. señala que su español “no es tan malo”, ya que puede hablar y comunicarse, pero carece de hispanohablantes con quienes comunicarse en su vida personal. Para A., la experiencia paradigmática de violencia lingüística tiene que ver con el estigma que rodea a los nombres en español, especialmente cuando se unió a la Fuerza Aérea de los EE. UU. en 2002. Ser blanco de burlas y apodos por su nombre, como también la americanización su nombre fueron causa de una vergüenza duradera y sentimientos de inferioridad vinculados a sus habilidades bilingües y su identidad latina. Para afrontarlo, A. construyó “cajas” lingüísticas y comunitarias separadas, que ahora ve como parte de su autodepresiación. Con el tiempo, A. ha trabajado para liberarse de estas cajas y abrazar su bilingüismo como una forma natural y empoderadora de expresarse. Si bien el bilingüismo nativo puede ser una fuente de beneficios, para A. ha sido principalmente una fuente de daño y vergüenza, lo que lleva a sentimientos de ira, relaciones poco saludables y pensamientos negativos sobre sí mismo, y otros desafíos y barreras en su vida. A. distingue entre daño lingüístico interno y externo, y reconoce que, si bien el daño externo está fuera de su control, su recorrido personal se centra en eliminar el daño autoinfligido. A través de esta transformación, A. reinventó una autoimagen más saludable como ciudadano estadounidense con herencia mexicana y tiene el deseo de compartir su experiencia para construir comunidad.
Keywords
Latinx, Mexican Heritage, Bilingual Identity, Bilingual Speaker, Pronunciation, Americanized Name, Name Butchering, Northeastern Illinois University, Linguistics, Language Empowerment, Self-Transformation, Reimagine Latinx Identity, Language Healing, Cultural Aggression, Linguistic Safe Space, Linguistic Discrimination, Microaggression, Linguistic Shame, Language Mocking, Bilingual Kinship U.S. Armed Forces, Linguistic Harm, Spanish, English, Broken Spanish, Broken English, Testimonio, Latines in the Academia, Name Butchering, National Language
Length of Testimonio
00:22:15
Language(s) of Testimonio
Spanish, English
Rights
IN COPYRIGHT - EDUCATIONAL USE PERMITTED This Item is protected by copyright and/or related rights. You are free to use this Item in any way that is permitted by the copyright and related rights legislation that applies to your use. In addition, no permission is required from the rights-holder(s) for educational uses. For other uses, you need to obtain permission from the rights-holder(s).
Recommended Citation
Jaramillo, Agustin, "Latinx Testimonio on Linguistic Shame, Resistance, and Healing Project / Jaramillo" (2024). Latinx Testimonio on Linguistic Shame, Resistance, and Healing Project, Northeastern Illinois University.